It would be nice if the rightwing dolts ever got worked up over things that matter… like Russian interference in our democratic elections or the disturbing trend of violence against the media. (Heck, I’d settle for them just not championing those things.)
But no, it's f--ing ice cream.
Ben & Jerry’s decided to protest Australia’s gay marriage ban by instituting a "ban" of their own. They are asking the employees of their 26 stores in Australia to not allow two scoops of the same ice cream. The company has also set up “post boxes” with postcards customers can sign and drop in to be sent to their local member of parliament. They will be delivered by June 13, which I imagine is when this “two scoop ban" will end.
This is a peaceful and funny way for a responsible corporation to call attention to an injustice. Naturally, the rightwing venues are losing their collective mind. One of my favorites is this piece at RedState, where they decided to waste space railing against this new policy with a frontpage article that—no kidding—is entitled "Ben and Jerrys’ Absurd and Stupid Gay Marriage Stunt”. The last line is this:
It’s yet another case of liberals quite literally shoving their opinions down our throats.
First of all, NO ONE is forcing you to do anything. (And why do homophobes always insist on using innuendo to phrase shoving things down their throats?)
Second, way to miss the point. The ice cream ban IS stupid and absurd, just like the ban for.. oh, why do I even bother explaining this.
Third, learn to focus your outrage to when the government bans things based on ideology. The government....NOT a private company. Do I really need to point out the irony here in supposed conservative orthodoxy? I will spell it out for you: your outrage should be at a certain, real, and oppressive ban by the government, not at a satirical ban by a hippie ice cream company. (And fourth, please, learn the definition of the word “literally”.)
Enough of that rant. Now for the new rant: Giving someone else their civil rights has never led to someone taking your civil rights, just like banning gay marriage isn’t going to magically help your marriage. Yet throughout history, the one constant with the rightwing is that they are always on the side of denying a marginalized group of citizens their civil rights. Thankfully, eventually they always lose—before they move on to the next group to hate.
I picked on RedState, but there are plenty of rightwing outlets that weren’t as "eloquent", and none of them hold a candle to the commenters in their target audience. A shout-out to all the internet loons and trolls who misspell using ALL CAPS!!!, scream BOYCOTT!!, and then go on the same tired tirade of the evils of marriage equality and gay people in general.
It’s ice cream, folks. Throwing a tantrum over not getting two scoops of ice cream is pathetic.
Who do you think you are, President Trump?
All I know is that I really didn't need any excuse to break my diet, but after reading about this, I am heading over to my local 7-11 to get a pint of Salted Caramel Core right now. Godspeed Ben & Jerry’s!
Here’s their announcement:
In Australia, 72% of the population supports Marriage Equality, so why haven’t our leaders acted? Before the next parliamentary sitting on June 13th, it is time to stand up for fair and equal rights for all by letting our leaders know that we demand Marriage Equality!
Imagine heading down to your local Scoop Shop to order your favourite two scoops of Cookie Dough in a waffle cone. But you find out you are not allowed – Ben & Jerry’s has banned two scoops of the same flavour. You’d be furious! Don’t live near a scoop shop – no problem! You can sign up through the Equality Campaign’s website here.
But this doesn’t even begin to compare to how furious you would be if you were told you were not allowed to marry the person you love. So we are banning two scoops of the same flavor and encouraging our fans to contact their MPs to tell them that the time has come – make marriage equality legal! Love comes in all flavours!